Leaving
by Alien Altered
Summary: He’d spent too long in a mask of womanising and cruel intentions that no one believed he could break that mould. It was a habit every Upper East Sider possessed – the ability to run when the truth became too much. Chuck/Blair angst. Two-parter.
1. Chuck

I own none of the characters – wish I did

I own none of the characters – wish I did.

No one understood. He'd spent too long in a mask of womanising and cruel intentions that no one believed he could break from that mould. But as unfathomable as the concept was, the truth was that Chuck Bass genuinely cared for Blair Waldorf. In his own fucked up way, he loved her.

He'd never had any need for love; meaningless sex was all he needed, but with Blair he wanted more. However, she always went back to Nate. Nate didn't deserve her; he cheated on her, lied to her, cared more about Serena than his own girlfriend. Chuck would never do that. But she would never feel the same for him, and Chuck had finally resigned himself to that fact, so he was leaving, running away. Running away from her laugh, and luscious hair, her lips and chocolate eyes. It was a habit every 'Upper East Sider' possessed – the ability to run when the truth became too much. Maybe if he left for just a little while he'd be able to sleep without seeing her, be able to wake without fluttering in his stomach, maybe he'd be able to breathe without imagining her scent, and maybe he'd finally be able to forget about Blair Waldorf. Hopefully by the time he returned Chuck would be back to his old ways, no need for Blaire, no lingering feelings or sickening love; but he doubted that would ever happen. He just needed a while to repaint his mask, tighten the straps that held it in place, and prepare a few more lies; then everything would be back to normal.

He knew he'd never find another like her. She understood him. She could read his silence, his voice, his eyes, his smile, every god damn thing about him, she could interpret. She had grasped the idea that maybe there was another layer to him, a layer that represented more than it was meant to and was worth more than face value, but she turned her head, ignored it, because emotions are something that they're not supposed to feel – it's easier for everyone that way. That's the way things are in the 'Upper East Side' – you hide behind smokes, expensive clothes and bottles of alcohol; do drugs so that it's easier to forget, ignore and pretend. In the 'Upper East Side' you date who your parents suggest, do what your ignorant parents want and act like your to shallow to even care. And you don't fall in love; you never fall in love; because in the 'Upper East Side' friends discard you as they discard empty bottles of gin, it's just how it is. One wrong move, one notion of disagreement and your out, that's why it's easier not to care.

By the time he's back maybe things will be different, or maybe not. He loves Blaire, more than he ever believed people could love, and that's why he's leaving. Love isn't part of the plan. His Dad didn't even ask for an explanation, happy to send his son to some other far away place. And as Chuck's plane ascends into the clouds, he thinks once more of Blaire's face. Leaving hurts, but it's better than staying, right?

So, what do you think? This was my first GG fic, it's based on the TV show, not the book. I hope you liked it. Please review.


	2. Blair

**Disclaimer: **I own none of the known characters of Gossip Girl.

The silk robe was tied tightly around her too thin waist when her phone vibrated. Nate had just left, and Blair was having a difficult time trying to stop smiling, things were back to how they were supposed to be. It was always supposed to be Nate and Blair, and finally they were back; king and queen reunited. Flipping open her phone Blair saw a new message from Gossip Girl. Her smile disappeared as she read it.

_Spotted. C, bags packed and headed to the airport. Where's he going? Your guess is as good as mine. But I'll be watching. XOXO. Gossip Girl._

Blair knew why Chuck would have left. He had cared about her, more than a fuck-buddy, or a part-time lover; he had honestly felt affection for her. And she'd known that, if she was being honest she reciprocated his emotions a bit. But that wasn't the way it was supposed to be. No matter how much they cared about each other, no matter how great the sex was; it was always supposed to be Nate and Blair. That's what everyone wanted. The Waldorf's and the Archibald's were ecstatic over the relationship, the couple were the envy of the entire school, Nate loved being with someone as gorgeous as Blair, and Blair needed to be with Nate. She needed the attention, she needed the way of ensuring she'd never fall from her crown again, she needed to be envied and adored, she needed to prove that she was as good, if not better than Serena, and she needed to be the picture-perfect fairy-tale couple. That was just who she was, who she'd always been. Blair needed the attention fix.

She knew it was her fault; she'd used him, treated him like dirt. In her mind it was payback; payback to Chuck for all his conquests, payback to Nate for sleeping with her best friend. But Blair couldn't help herself, Chuck attracted Blair like not even Nate had; he was wild, scheming. Chuck was a way to rebel, to prove that she wasn't boring in comparison to Serena, to escape. She had a power over Chuck, and she revealed in that; she now had the type of power over Chuck that Serena had seemed to possess over Nate.

When she'd been with Chuck she didn't have to pretend, she could be exactly who she was, exactly who she wanted to be. Everyday she hid behind a castle of money, expensive clothes, extravagant jewellery, excessive make-up, styled hair, and last names. But when she was with Chuck, Blair could forget about disappointed dreams, let-down parents, false friends, and gossiping classmates.

But now he was gone. No goodbye, nothing; just like Serena had; just like she'd planned to. The trait all 'Upper East Siders' shared – the talent and gift to pickup and run, never caring about who was left in the wake. But Chuck had never been one to follow suit, so Blair was surprised that he'd finally taken the hint and got lost, mimicking the actions of too many before him.

She'd regained her fairytale boyfriend, taken back her crown, become 'Queen B' again, but at what cost? She'd traded in a man who possibly loved her, a man she trusted and could let loose around, for a boy who was still hung up on Serena. Her confident, lover, friend, partner in crime and the guy who had possibly captured her heart with his butterflies (although she'd never admit it), was now on a plane to god-knows-where, for an unknown amount of time. And she had to live with the fact that she had been the reason for his departure.

But that was the crime of the 'Upper East Siders', the sacrifice for the fairytale ending, the price for that god-damn picture-perfect life – and even if it wasn't worth it, the need for that was too great to deny. Blair had finally pieced back together her life, but a piece was gone, leaving a few cracks. Still, Blair had a reputation to uphold; so she dressed in a stunning dress, applied her make-up and left the house – Blair Waldorf needs no one and mourns the loss of no one. But she couldn't deny the poke in her heart when she saw a checked scarf in a shop window, not that she'd admit that out loud, after all she was Blair Waldorf, and Blair Waldorf never even liked Chuck Bass, right?

So, what did you think? Please review! Thanks for reading.


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